Any nurses or would the resident doctors know?

[Bill Murray]

I'm going for day surgery next week and went to the pre-admission clinic yesterday and was as expected. Took vitals, an ECG, some bloodwork and a list of instructions.

I thought one of them was a bit weird. They want me to bring a water bottle (makes sense) but are rather emphatic that they want it to be empty. Why? Do they think I'm going to be smuggling in some vodka? Are they going to give me special hospital water?

Thoughts?

 

[Bad Hippo]

I'm going for day surgery next week and went to the pre-admission clinic yesterday and was as expected. Took vitals, an ECG, some bloodwork and a list of instructions.

I thought one of them was a bit weird. They want me to bring a water bottle (makes sense) but are rather emphatic that they want it to be empty. Why? Do they think I'm going to be smuggling in some vodka? Are they going to give me special hospital water?

Thoughts?

View attachment 785951

That will be so they can either take the piss out of you, or it's drain your seething sarcasm before the op.

 

[The anarchist]

My wife has had several day surgeries and we've never been asked that 😂 the last one was just 2 months ago👍 really weird🤔

 

[Captain GhoulAgain]

I think they believe Popeye is coming in for forearm reduction surgery . Just fist it. Like Nike.

 

[djdeeds]

Don't forget to shave the hairs off your ass because those hospital gowns never close properly at the back, gotta look your best

 

[Klugscheisser]

I'm going for day surgery next week and went to the pre-admission clinic yesterday and was as expected. Took vitals, an ECG, some bloodwork and a list of instructions.

I thought one of them was a bit weird. They want me to bring a water bottle (makes sense) but are rather emphatic that they want it to be empty. Why? Do they think I'm going to be smuggling in some vodka? Are they going to give me special hospital water?

Thoughts?

View attachment 785951

In the US, right? Probably some attempt to prevent or reduce the risk of litigation. Some genius before you smuggled in Tequila and had a bad interaction with an analgesic.

 

[Douglas1r]

Vodka. Vodka is the answer. Vodka is the answer for everything.

 

[Bill Murray]

or it's drain your seething sarcasm before the op

Well fuck that happy horseshit. Sarcasm is my raison d'etre.

My wife has had several day surgeries and we've never been asked that 😂 the last one was just 2 months ago👍 really weird🤔

Hope they went well.

The other thing that I did ask the nurse about (she was lovely, cute and very professional) was this business of nothing by mouth from midnight the night before. That IMO and based on everything I've read is nonsense. While I wouldn't think a full buffet breakfast is suggested having a piece of toast with coffee and OJ should be more than fine. The nurse and I chatted about that and she agreed but said she has to go with the company line about nothing PO.

I'll be much happier and much easier to deal with if I've had a coffee the morning of surgery.

In the US, right?

Canadistan

Vodka. Vodka is the answer. Vodka is the answer for everything.

I should really fuck with them and bring in a vodka bottle but filled with water.

 

[MysteryTraveler]

I'd be equally confused by the line, "Do not bring valuables to the hospital or give them to your support person for safe keeping." So I can't do either?

Good luck with your procedure. We'll be here rooting for you, and waiting for pictures.

 

[Bill Murray]

Don't forget to shave the hairs off your ass because those hospital gowns never close properly at the back, gotta look your best

Fuck that. I have video of me from the extended hospital stay in 2020 where I was learning to walk again. Its me and a collection of nurses & physiotherapists....one moving the IV pole, one moving the O2 tank, one pushing a chair behind me in case I needed a break, one keeping me steady and one filming me (I didn't think I was making progress so they wanted to record me to see how I was improving day by day). In the ICU with my bare hairy ass hanging out the gown. This was after a few months of being in hospital so by that point you have no dignity or shame left so the last thing to be worried about is a gown not providing full coverage.

So ya, they're going to get me hairy ass and all.

I'd be equally confused by the line, "Do not bring valuables to the hospital or give them to your support person for safe keeping." So I can't do either?

Good luck with your procedure. We'll be here rooting for you, and waiting for pictures.

They really don't want to be responsible for any personal items going missing. They're likely going to tell me to be there at 6am with a surgery sometime after noon. WTF are they expecting me to do for six hours? I can only wank so many times before they tell me to stop.

Thank you. I don't know if I'll be able to take any pictures of me since everything is internal but will see what I can do.

 

[Gone crazy back soon]

With the increase in the cost of everything they can no longer afford to give you the fancy white hospital cup with the graduated measurements and large bore bendy straw like they did back in the day. You have to provide your own canteen but they can still spring for tap water for you.

 

[Bad Hippo]

Fuck that. I have video of me from the extended hospital stay in 2020 where I was learning to walk again. Its me and a collection of nurses & physiotherapists....one moving the IV pole, one moving the O2 tank, one pushing a chair behind me in case I needed a break, one keeping me steady and one filming me (I didn't think I was making progress so they wanted to record me to see how I was improving day by day). In the ICU with my bare hairy ass hanging out the gown. This was after a few months of being in hospital so by that point you have no dignity or shame left so the last thing to be worried about is a gown not providing full coverage.

So ya, they're going to get me hairy ass and all.



They really don't want to be responsible for any personal items going missing. They're likely going to tell me to be there at 6am with a surgery sometime after noon. WTF are they expecting me to do for six hours? I can only wank so many times before they tell me to stop.

Thank you. I don't know if I'll be able to take any pictures of me since everything is internal but will see what I can do.

Admit it...... this was you, last time you were in hospital.

 

[Captain GhoulAgain]

I hope they shave your balls and you fall asleep wondering why.

 

[Bill Murray]

With the increase in the cost of everything they can no longer afford to give you the fancy white hospital cup with the graduated measurements and large bore bendy straw like they did back in the day. You have to provide your own canteen but they can still spring for tap water for you.

You know, you're probably correct. The cost and the fact that our municipal government has been on a tear to get rid of anything single use. There was briefly even a bylaw that if you went to a fast food restaurant you had ask for a straw, condiments and a bag (which they also had to charge you for). Again, you had to ask for it...they couldn't offer it to you. We're being governed by lunatics.

Admit it...... this was you, last time you were in hospital.

LOL, no not me although I did leave a hospital against medical advice once. Actually thats not true. I was in for a few months after a motorbike accident and they had given me a weekend pass to go home with the understanding that I'd come and check back in on Monday morning. I enjoyed the freedom so much that I said fuck it, if being home for a couple days didn't kill me I guess I no longer needed to be in the hospital. Went back around noon to grab my shit and tell them I wasn't staying. They were not happy with me.

I hope they shave your balls and you fall asleep wondering why.

You're assuming they aren't already shaved. Hairy ass, smooth nuts is how I roll. I will be put to sleep tho, not terribly happy about that but for this procedure its for the best.

 

[Captain GhoulAgain]

You know, you're probably correct. The cost and the fact that our municipal government has been on a tear to get rid of anything single use. There was briefly even a bylaw that if you went to a fast food restaurant you had ask for a straw, condiments and a bag (which they also had to charge you for). Again, you had to ask for it...they couldn't offer it to you. We're being governed by lunatics.


LOL, no not me although I did leave a hospital against medical advice once. Actually thats not true. I was in for a few months after a motorbike accident and they had given me a weekend pass to go home with the understanding that I'd come and check back in on Monday morning. I enjoyed the freedom so much that I said fuck it, if being home for a couple days didn't kill me I guess I no longer needed to be in the hospital. Went back around noon to grab my shit and tell them I wasn't staying. They were not happy with me.


You're assuming they aren't already shaved. Hairy ass, smooth nuts is how I roll. I will be put to sleep tho, not terribly happy about that but for this procedure its for the best.

You are like the opposite of a gorilla. Jesus, we found the first man.

 

[Fäthër Cörpsë]

It’s for thyroid carcinoma. You gon die, sorry

 

[handbanana72]

I'm going for day surgery next week and went to the pre-admission clinic yesterday and was as expected. Took vitals, an ECG, some bloodwork and a list of instructions.

I thought one of them was a bit weird. They want me to bring a water bottle (makes sense) but are rather emphatic that they want it to be empty. Why? Do they think I'm going to be smuggling in some vodka? Are they going to give me special hospital water?

Thoughts?

View attachment 785951is your surgery at a hospital or stand alone surgery center? Most facilities have a pt bag with the name of the place on it and supply the cups. Either they're really low on supplies, tight with money or no money, or shits really changed in the 2 yrs I've been out of the hospital setting. Hope your procedure goes well😊

 

[Bill Murray]

@handbanana72

Its at a hospital. I've had enough procedures to normally know the drill of what to bring/not to bring. I'm a classy guy and won't be packing my shit into plastic bags. I'll be wearing my normal spring/summer uniform of t-shirt & pair of UA shorts and will pack a spare just incase. That along with my notes about the procedure, a notebook, pair of earbuds and a battery pack...oh, and my empty water bottle will all be nicely tucked away in a smallish backpack. I make nice with nurses and normally get along with them so don't foresee a problem. Its just the empty part that makes no sense to me.

Cause if it is to prevent someone from bringing in booze I don't think its very effective. A pisstank is going to do what a pisstank wants and will figure out a way to bring a nippy bottle with them. And for fuck sakes, to cater to addicts our hospitals all have safe consumption rooms so they can smoke or inject to their hearts content (I guess it keeps them out of the stairwells).

Speaking of pisstanks, how's Gary been? He back posting? I missed him

 

[Bruno Schulz]

Don't forget to shave the hairs off your ass because those hospital gowns never close properly at the back, gotta look your best

Agree, might be good to wax and bleach your asshole too just to be sure. You never know!

 

[Bill Murray]

Agree, might be good to wax and bleach your asshole too just to be sure. You never know!