5 Years Sober

[Mark 5210]

Nobody likes a QUITTER!!!

 

[(G.O.A.T.) Tubemonkey]

Nobody likes a QUITTER!!!

Congratulations, you're retarded!

 

[SearCutFAL]

I think this definitely calls for a drink, make mine a Double.
Nah, congratulations. 😉

 

[Hookah-smoking-catapillar]

I wish only good things for you hun. You are stronger than you sometimes might feel. You got this.
#LOVEYOURSELF

 

[(G.O.A.T.) Tubemonkey]

Today is my sobriety anniversary 9 years clean.

 

[Qtek2020]

5 years ago today, I was being admitted to a 6-week inpatient centre for opioid and alcohol detox and rehab. So it’s my 5 years sober check point today.

Prior to this, I was taking enough oxycodone or morphine each day to give 300 patients the higher of the two starting doses. I could down a whole bottle of Oxynorm just to feel normal for an hour or two. Being a doctor makes it too easy to get these drugs, and too easy to hide it. Waking up each day in cold turkey and sneaking the normalising dose I’d hidden was fucking awful.

On the run up to rock bottom, I practiced aiming my Golf GTI I had back then at walls on a local country road at 100mph to work out where I could kill myself and make it look like an accident. This was because my insane addict mind thought my family would cope better with my accidental death, than finding out I was an addict. I didn’t go ahead with it because I couldn’t detox myself long enough to get a clean blood set for the Coroner, and that would prevent my wife getting my life insurance. Addiction has oddly creative insanity.

So I got to the point I told my family as a last resort. Amazingly, they stuck by me and got me help. I was put into rehab by a service that cares for NHS doctors with mental health problems, and also got my later ADHD diagnosis via them too.

I joined GG a couple of month after rehab, and it’s been a big part of my recovery journey. I mean a big part as you guys have truly helped me get to being clean, and the happiest and strongest I’ve ever been. This is a place I can let myself be myself around like minded nutters.

I owe my life to my family, the team at rehab etc, hard work on my part, but also you guys. The gratitude I have for my support network is infinite, even though infinity is a doddle for me to count to.

I wholeheartedly thank every one of you for being part of my recovery journey. I really mean that. You guys are fucking awesome, and I hold a lot of love for you all.

Special thanks for the staff for keeping the site running for us.

Thanks for reading this soppy and serious post. If anyone is struggling with addiction, it is possible to beat even if it’s painfully difficult. Be honest and open up, to yourself first. Don’t be afraid to speak up here. Learn to let love in, and let go of the past.

Again, my sincere thanks to you all.


Here’s the meditation tent at rehab.

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And a dry sand portrait of my mum’s horse I did in art therapy on the hottest day of the year.

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Turning gay?