How would you try and prevent a suicide-jumper from leaping?

[ShartCart]

Walk up, pull my pants down and instantly evacuate my bowels all over the floor in front of him. While saying over and over “ how lovely today is”

 

[badangel7]

kick him in the nuts
that should distract him...

 

[Tottie]

Here’s Rick James’ suicide-prevention method - to talk someone down from a ledge:

I’ll start by doing a traditional/cheezy “don’t jump, your life can change” talk, and then out of nowhere I, the negotiator, pull down my pants and starts masturbating, while looking the jumper dead in the eye. Without saying anything. The jumper is going to be like, “what the fuck man?”… and while the dude is watching me - i mean the Negatiator - wackin’ it, someone creeps up behind him and grabs him.

What would your guys’ strategies be to get a suicidal person in custody? Or techniques to talk them down.

I'd push them it's 100% effective for stopping them from jumping.

 

[Smooby]

Here’s Rick James’ suicide-prevention method - to talk someone down from a ledge:

I’ll start by doing a traditional/cheezy “don’t jump, your life can change” talk, and then out of nowhere I, the negotiator, pull down my pants and starts masturbating, while looking the jumper dead in the eye. Without saying anything. The jumper is going to be like, “what the fuck man?”… and while the dude is watching me - i mean the Negatiator - wackin’ it, someone creeps up behind him and grabs him.

What would your guys’ strategies be to get a suicidal person in custody? Or techniques to talk them down.

Probably something similar to Homelander

 

[wiggins]

Here’s Rick James’ suicide-prevention method - to talk someone down from a ledge:

I’ll start by doing a traditional/cheezy “don’t jump, your life can change” talk, and then out of nowhere I, the negotiator, pull down my pants and starts masturbating, while looking the jumper dead in the eye. Without saying anything. The jumper is going to be like, “what the fuck man?”… and while the dude is watching me - i mean the Negatiator - wackin’ it, someone creeps up behind him and grabs him.

What would your guys’ strategies be to get a suicidal person in custody? Or techniques to talk them down.

Spinal shot...

 

[K.I.T.T.]

I wouldn't try at all. I'd start recording, grab a bullhorn and shout "Rick James thinks you're a chickenshit!" and then I'd post the video of them jumping. Right here in this thread.

 

[Super Kirbo]

Tie a bungee round there necks

 

[mrln]

id stop them from leaping,by pushing them!

 

[Goldfingers]

Here’s Rick James’ suicide-prevention method - to talk someone down from a ledge:

I’ll start by doing a traditional/cheezy “don’t jump, your life can change” talk, and then out of nowhere I, the negotiator, pull down my pants and starts masturbating, while looking the jumper dead in the eye. Without saying anything. The jumper is going to be like, “what the fuck man?”… and while the dude is watching me - i mean the Negatiator - wackin’ it, someone creeps up behind him and grabs him.

What would your guys’ strategies be to get a suicidal person in custody? Or techniques to talk them down.

I'd just ask him to have a sense of humour when he jumps and flap his arms screaming "TWEET TWEET TWEEEEEE" before impact.
Then he'll look funny rather than the thick twat we already think he is

 

[Zeodus]

I'd tell them to wait for a bit, that I'll be right back. I'd go to someplace that sells those air powered darts they use in the jungle to knock explorers out cold, along with some poison just to sedate.

I would then launch a dart at the suicide candidate just as if I were a seasoned jungle dweller. This would cause the suicidal person to either fall away from the ledge, or off it. If he falls off, his demise was meant to be. If he falls in a direction which he doesn't fall of the ledge, I paint his face all kinds of colors as if he were a clown, and drop him off at the doorstep of a random person.

 

[K.I.T.T.]

I'd tell them to wait for a bit, that I'll be right back. I'd go to someplace that sells those air powered darts they use in the jungle to knock explorers out cold, along with some poison just to sedate.

I would then launch a dart at the suicide candidate just as if I were a seasoned jungle dweller. This would cause the suicidal person to either fall away from the ledge, or off it. If he falls off, his demise was meant to be. If he falls in a direction which he doesn't fall of the ledge, I paint his face all kinds of colors as if he were a clown, and drop him off at the doorstep of a random person.

The best part of this is: "I'd tell them to wait for a bit, that I'll be right back."🤣

 

[Denim Chicken]

'No. Stop. Don't. No? Ok bye'- Me probably

 

[SGElliot]

Tell them that they get extra style points if they can hit anyone else as they land

 

[[MERIT]]

Tell them to stay up there because the floor is lava.

 

[Adnilreb]

I cant. If they see me its an instant jump, so im no help.

 

[mrln]

I can. If they see me its an instant they wanna jump my bones, so i can help.

im feeling suicidal

 

[Adnilreb]

im feeling suicidal

Thats a cute invitation

 

[Rick James]

im feeling suicidal

That was the most Emo pick-up line i’ve ever seen.

 

[K.I.T.T.]

That was the most Emo pick-up line i’ve ever seen.

Rick, you know they don't like to be called "Emo" anymore. Ya gotta use the politically-correct terminology:

Bitches

 

[Super Kirbo]

I will let him/her suicide , fuck all people ! I hate humans especially women

How to say you are a emo without saying you are a emo